How To Date as a Short Guy

October 27, 2023
How To Date as a Short Guy
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How To Date as a Short Guy and Dominate The Dating Scene

Let’s clear something up about height and dating - it almost never matters.  If you’re a guy under 5”6, don’t blame the lack of you towering over people as the reason why your love life sucks.

With tall guys, some have a great track record with women, and others not so great. The same is true with shorter men.

A multitude of other factors are the actual difference makers when it comes to your love life like success, financial stability, looks, style, swagger, conversation skills, and personality. If you’re putting up a half-assed attempt to dominate these categories, and your love-life stinks, don’t blame your height on it. This is now a “you” problem, not a genetics problem.

It’s a weak move to put blame on things you can’t control as being why your romantic life isn’t where it needs to be. There is plenty you can work on. Be self-conscious about things in your actual power that are lacking. Focusing on your height is a waste of time. Let’s go over some cardinal rules to follow as a short guy so you can dominate the dating scene.

Stop Dwelling On Your Height

Your height does not need to be the topic of conversation. I often get messages like “Kamilla, I’m 5’4. How do I mention my height to women before meeting them?”

The answer is you DON’T. If you’re on a dating app and it asks for your height, don’t hide the fact. Never lie. Say what your height is and own it. But don’t go into a soliloquy in your bio discussing the trials and tribulations your height has caused you.

“Well I’m 5”2 so I hope you like short guys. But don’t worry, all good things come in small packages.” This is tacky. Never talk about your height so openly on dating apps. I’ve had men go out of their way to “warn” women of their height. One guy made a cheesy joke about it in his bio saying “full disclosure: I’m 5’4, I don’t give a fu*k if you wear heels.”

This might sound clever but really it’s just you advertising your insecurity.  It screams: “I’m short and I want you to know about it beforehand to avoid the embarrassment of you being turned off when we meet in person. Please give me validation so I feel better about how short I am.” Women see right through this. Bottom line, don’t talk about your height.

Never bring it up in person either or on a date via a joke. When she meets you in person, she can make a decision for herself instead of you warning her ahead of time that you may not be good enough for her. By mentioning your height, what you are really doing is asking for sympathy and acceptance.

Height will matter very little if you pull up in a nice car, have a decent watch, and subtly bring up that you have a great career. Killing it in life is the great equalizer for men. How many feet and inches you are will not matter in her eyes once she senses you have game and can offer her security in life.

Don’t Complain About Your Height

Stop victimizing yourself when it comes to your height. Do not constantly complain about it to your friends or family members. The biggest issue when doing this? If they happen to meet a woman who might be interested in you, the first thing they’ll say is “You and my friend Dave might hit it off. But just a word of caution, he’s short. Still interested?”

Why is your height on their mind and one of the first things they’ll say to someone they want to hook you up with? You complained about it so much, it’s now become a part of your identity. You’ve stigmatized your height as if it’s a disability. So now they need to confirm with others if your “disability” is a dealbreaker.

Vice versa, if you never discussed your height and you walked with an air of confidence, chances are they would never bring it up. They’d say “You and my friend Dave might hit it off. He’s a successful broker. Here’s some pictures of him.” Height would not be something that’s discussed. They would instead focus on the positive aspects of you in their introduction.

The other issue with complaining about your height? It’s negative self-talk. You are beating down your own confidence. You’re turning your height into a gray cloud that hovers over you at all times.

When a guy constantly brings up his height even in a light-hearted way, it’ll prompt others to make jokes about it on your behalf. You are putting ideas into their head. Don’t put it into anyone’s head that you are even remotely concerned about your height. Zero. It’s a non-issue. If you’re asked about it, shrug it off and move on to the next topic. It’s something that you were born with and nothing can be done about it – next topic. If you make a big deal out of something, others will too.

Dealing With Women Who Have Height Requirements

If a woman has a height standard, that’s her problem, not yours. Women who won’t date a guy under a certain height are stupid. They lack life experience to know that things like height are nonessential. Intelligent and well-rounded women don’t put any thought into these silly things.

Relevant factors to consider in dating are the guy’s career, aspirations, how he will treat a woman, if he can make her laugh, what his values are, and so on.

Smart women know that they can be missing out on someone really great by setting a height standard. Whenever I hear height mentioned from a woman as her type, I have to roll my eyes. This comment alone signals to me that she’s dealing with serious insecurities of her own, or that she’s got nothing to offer but her looks.

So let’s say you’re on a date and she mentions “I actually only date guys that are over six foot.” Never respond with “Well I offer so much more than my height. Here’s a list of what makes me great and why you should look past how short I am.” She insulted you. So you need to insult her back.

“I actually only date girls with smaller noses but I figured there’s more to you besides that big nose so I decided to look passed it. No one’s perfect these days huh?”

“Oh yeah? I usually date girls with actual careers. But I decided to make an exception tonight.”

Is this mean on your end? Of course. But she started it. She sounds like a bimbo anyway and if she’s complaining about your height, it’s likely going to go nowhere. You might as well show her that you’ve got teeth and aren’t afraid to bark back.

When you react differently to her expectations, she might even be embarrassed that she even brought up height. Then, she’ll wonder whether you still like her after you exposed her shallowness.

Women Don’t Have Sex With Betas

By signaling your insecurity about your height, you signal your lack of confidence. This definitely makes you appear more beta. And women typically do not sleep with beta men.

She does not want to all of the sudden picture you in bed not only acting self-conscious about your height, but your penis size too. No girl wants to coddle and baby a man’s sexual inadequacy. She’s not here to make you feel better about yourself. She’ll get into bed with you if she subconsciously gets the hint you’ll take charge in bed and be confident in knowing how to pleasure her.

If at any moment, she thinks sex will be a disaster with you, sex is likely off the menu. And the #1 way to make her think that is by being insecure about your height. Not only will she not sleep with you, she’ll friendzone you.

What To Focus On As A Short Guy

Instead of thinking about your height, focus on this instead as a short guy:

Style and Appearance: Clothing, fashion-sense, and grooming make a man. Make sure your haircut and beard is on point. If you can grow a beard, go for it. Level up your style so your outfit is what grabs the attention of a woman, not your height. Being short and looking like a slob is a disaster. Definitely make sure you are dressed well, properly groomed, and take care of your skin.

Fitness: Being short doesn't mean you should be sloppy. Make sure you pack on as much lean muscle as you can. If you’re short, you don’t want to be too slim either. You want to widen yourself out and have nice strong looking arms. Make sure you’re a beast at the gym.

Lifestyle: Having your own car and apartment will put you ahead of most men. It doesn’t matter if a guy is tall - if he still lives with his parents, that’s an issue. Therefore get your money right. Have a decent car, a clean apartment, and basically your sh*t together.

Personality: Being funny and knowing how to talk to women is a plus. Intellectual men who can have a conversation are always going to be in demand. Women love it when a guy knows things and can talk about anything. They want to be able to bring you to places and watch you work the room with your talking skills. And if getting better at conversation with women is something you can work on, I have just the resource for you. Check out Conversation Academy by clicking here.


In the end, no one cares about how many fish you didn’t catch. You only need to catch the right person once. Crying about your height will only hurt you. Own it and spend your time on things that will actually move the needle for you when it comes to dating.

Level up yourself as a man and stop crying about your height. It does not matter. There’s plenty of women out there who will easily look passed how short a guy is if he has the rest of his life in order.

Avatar for Kamilla - Men's Dating Coach


Men's Dating Coach

I'm a men's dating coach with over 300,000 social media followers and 25,000+ email subscribers. I’ve coached hundreds of men from all over the world and helped them with dating, relationships, and self-improvement.